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Unreasonable Hospitality: A Book Review

One of the best books I read in 2023 was Unreasonable Hospitality by Will Guidara (Optimism Press, 2022). I went well outside my usual reading zones with this one. While this might seem like good reading material for someone in an MBA program or a person hoping to work in the hospitality industry, what relevance does this book have for those in Christian ministry?

Unreasonable Hospitality is part memoir, part advice manual. Author Will Guidara ran the front of house at Eleven Madison Park, a well-known restaurant in New York City. Together with his then-business-partner and head of kitchen Daniel Humm, they elevated EMP to being ranked by their peers as the world’s #1 restaurant.

This book had a prominent spot in an episode of The Bear (season 2, episode 7). If you’ve watched it on Hulu, then you know The Bear is a fictional show about the restaurant business. Carmen, a celebrated chef, goes home to Chicago after his brother tragically dies. He ends up taking over the family beef sandwich shop. The show tells the story of Carmen trying to transform this greasy spoon into a fine-dining establishment, but at a deeper level, it’s about Carmen coming to grips with his family and with himself. And while it’s billed as a comedy, I find The Bear to be a heavy show that deals with the twists and turns of a dysfunctional family and how that plays out in Carmen’s own insecurities and missteps.

In the episode in question, Carmen’s cousin Richie has been blocking Carmen’s pursuit of transforming the restaurant; he fails to understand Carmen’s goal, largely because he can’t see where he fits in this new vision. Richie isn’t a chef and isn’t particularly skilled at anything, or so he believes. When Carmen sends Richie to do a stage (internship) in a fancy restaurant with a famous chef, Richie finally understands the power of hospitality—and his gift at providing it. And it’s here, in one scene, where you see Richie poring through Unreasonable Hospitality. On a whim, I bought it and read it, and I’m glad I did.

In the book, Guidara describes both his personal journey in the dining industry and how he developed his obsessive pursuit of being hospitable both to his staff and to their customers.

He describes how high-flying patrons used to be content with excellent food, no matter how stuffy or rude the service. Arrogant waiters and grumpy chefs were sometimes part of the shtick of fine dining!

Our society has changed, Guidara says, and expectations surrounding the hospitality industry have evolved with it. He argues convincingly that customers today aren’t satisfied with an amazing product. What people want is an unforgettable experience along with amazing food.

Unreasonable Hospitality raises possibilities and questions for pastoral or church work. On the one hand, we must consider how important experiences are for people today and how we must meet people where they are. On the other hand, we must ask how to take people’s incessant hunger for new experiences and bring that into conversation with the story of Jesus.

In an age where religion is often viewed as a commodity, churches ignore the importance of experience at their own peril. And yet, faith formation is so much more than an endless quest for more lavish and rewarding experiences. The real work of God in our world transcends our personal wants and desires.

But are Christian churches even thinking beyond how to engage people’s quest for authentic experiences? Of course, some deny the importance of experience altogether. But even if they try to meet people where they are in their quest for unreasonable hospitality, are those churches then willing and able to lead believers into real encounters with a risen Lord who requires that they take up their cross and follow him?

These questions go beyond Will Guidara’s fascinating book, but I can’t keep myself from asking them as I ponder my role as a Christian minister in the complex landscape of North America today.